BEAST OR BEAUTY?

April 21, 2026April 21, 2026 / revheff / Leave a comment

Taming Anger by Self-Restraint

My preparation for a lifetime of pastoral ministry spanned some fifteen years of formal education. Three earned degrees profited me in many ways. But their value paled in comparison to lessons gained over greater time in the school of God’s providence. Ecclesiastes 7:14 sums up the curriculum: In the day of prosperity be joyful, and in the day of adversity consider: God has made the one as well as the other, so that man may not find out anything that will be after him. Days of adversity—hard providence—make particularly good tutors for valuable lessons in character development.

In my last post Schlump or Sage, I promised next to visit 1 Samuel 24-26 for insight on how God works in this way. (Please click there to read those chapters.) They form a unit where we find David—heir apparent to Israel’s throne—with God in the school of hard providence. He continually escaped King Saul’s bloodthirsty wrath on the run in the wilderness of Judah. Chapter 24 records a dramatic cave encounter where David nearly capitalized on Saul’s vulnerability—going even so far as to cut off a corner of his robe—symbolic of his kingship. But conscience-stricken he stopped short: “The LORD forbid that I should do this thing to my lord, the LORD’s anointed, to put out my hand against him, seeing he is the LORD’s anointed.” Lesson learned: not my prerogative, God’s. Wait for his timing. Similar training awaits David with Saul again in chapter 26:

9 But David said to Abishai, “Do not destroy him, for who can put out his hand against the Lord’s anointed and be guiltless?” 10 And David said, “As the Lord lives, the Lord will strike him, or his day will come to die, or he will go down into battle and perish. 11 The Lord forbid that I should put out my hand against the Lord’s anointed.

David feared God to disobey Leviticus 19:18: You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD. He gets the wisdom of Proverbs 20:22: Do not say, “I will repay evil”; wait for the LORD, and he will deliver you.

At first blush, chapter 25 seems out of place. Saul shows up just once in the narrative. A different cast of characters join the story. What’s this mess with moron Nabal and rockstar Abigail all about? THE SAME LESSON! Beware the evil of bloodguilt. Check out David’s bottom line in v. 32:

32 And David said to Abigail, “Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me! 33 Blessed be your discretion, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodguilt and from working salvation with my own hand! 34 For as surely as the Lord, the God of Israel, lives, who has restrained me from hurting you, unless you had hurried and come to meet me, truly by morning there had not been left to Nabal so much as one male.”

A lesson so important as this to the man after God’s own heart warrants three long chapters to drive it home. Avoid shedding blood not yours to spill. Refuse the temptation to take matters best left up to God into your own hands. Learn to tame rage by cultivating self-restraint.

Here again is the point: The Lord uses trials like conflict to grow us in the virtues of self-restraint and waiting on Him. God uses four things to shape David’s character in this conflict: a great loss, a harsh offense, a wise woman, and a just end.

A great loss (1). The text opens on an ominous note: Now Samuel died. One commentary notes: Since the days of Moses and Joshua, no man had arisen to whom the covenant nation owed so much as to Samuel, who has been justly called the reformer and restorer of the theocracy. Samuel. Last of the judges, first of the prophets. A nation mourns. Most importantly—this friend, mentor, advisor, and guide to David whom he anointed in chapter 16 is gone. Puritan Matthew Henry noted: The loss is the more grievous at this juncture when Saul has grown so outrageous and David is driven from his country; never more need of Samuel than now, yet now he is removed.

Saul had acknowledged David’s right to the throne (24:20), but David—leery of his adversary—still retreated to his stronghold (22). Samuel’s death prompts an even deeper flight south. David was likely unnerved by the development, perhaps even fearful about renewed madness from Saul. Take note. Loss can make you vulnerable. It can set you up for unbelief and leave you off your guard for temptation. God’s man would need to learn the lesson driven home multiple times to Joshua after the death of his mentor and spiritual giant, Moses: Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go (Joshua 1:9). In adversity, consider. God makes it to transform us more and more into the likeness of Jesus.

A harsh offense (2-13). David’s request for provisions for his band of brothers smacks to 21^st century readers of running a protection racket. No way. Festival times like sheep-shearing meant lavish celebration and deep-pockets Nabal partied like royalty (36). Ancient Eastern cultural sentiment regarded generous hospitality a virtue even without the kind of guardian services David’s men provided from enemy brigands that the household staff called “a wall to us night and day” (16). And the petition by the ten emissaries represented David peaceably, respectfully, and perhaps even professionally since this may have been a kind of invitation to an ongoing contractual arrangement.

Nabal doesn’t simply decline the request for aid; he insults the Lord’s anointed with utter contempt. Verse 10: And Nabal answered David’s servants, “Who is David? Who is the son of Jesse? There are many servants these days who are breaking away from their masters. Don’t miss this. Nabal is Saul’s alter ego—a God-ordained surrogate stand-in. He even sounds like Saul—this son of Jesse. In Saul David duels with a man corrupted by power; in Nabal he feuds with a soul enslaved by wealth (11). Providence tests David’s heart as to what rules it through temptation triggered by both enemies in these 3 chapters. He passes with flying colors in 24 and 26 but nearly flunks fatally here in 25. Verse 13 says it all:

And David said to his men, “Every man strap on his sword!” And every man of them strapped on his sword. David also strapped on his sword. And about four hundred men went up after David, while two hundred remained with the baggage. Verses 21-22 further reveal just how hijacked by rage David had become: Now David had said, “Surely in vain have I guarded all that this fellow has in the wilderness, so that nothing was missed of all that belonged to him, and he has returned me evil for good. God do so to the enemies of David and more also, if by morning I leave so much as one male of all who belong to him.”

Yikes! Who is this David and what has become of the one in 24? Matthew Henry again: If one vexation seems to be over, we must not be secure; a storm may arise from some other point. What you do with and how you react to an egregious personal offense that threatens to trigger an emotional, verbal, text-FB-email, voicemail, and/or face to face murder-in-the-heart rampage says a whole lot about who’s on the throne of your heart at any given moment—the flesh or the Spirit. Are you beast or beauty? The Lord must teach his servant the wisdom of Proverbs 16:32: Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. David acts like Saul here; he desperately needs a “David” to intercept a pending disaster of his own doing which would cost him the throne. The Lord uses trials like conflict to grow us in the virtues of self-restraint and waiting on Him.

A wise woman (14-35). Enter Abagail. How Nabal landed this Proverbs 31 jewel defies imagination! She is everything in discretion and beauty that her pitbull beast of a husband is not. Tipped off by providential info from a servant about the impending disaster, she intervenes on behalf of her worthless husband. She navigates a masterful mediation that saves the day. She models Matthew 5:9 blessed-are-the-peacemakers skill—she is swift, decisive, generous, courageous, respectful, responsible, repentant, looking out for other’s interests, God-centered, and confident.

Let’s zero in on just one aspect of this the longest recorded speech by a woman in the Old Testament. Notice the first words out of her mouth face-down before David in v. 24. On me alone, my lord, be the guilt. She took responsibility. Mine’s the blame. She stood in the gap—ultimately averting David’s wrath. Nana Dolce, in a TGC blog post, helps us see that we have here more than a just-be-like wise, masterfully persuasive Abigail:

In Abigail we find something more stunning: a glimpse of the wise Mediator who charged forward to face wrath on behalf of foolish sinners—Jesus. This Mediator offered not just wisdom but his own life: “For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—but . . . while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. . . . We have now been justified by his blood, [therefore] much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God” (Rom. 5:7–9). To miss the shadow of the gospel in Abigail’s narrative is to miss the Mediator who turned away God’s wrath to reconcile us to the Father in the biggest story ever told. God brings us conflict as an assignment to help us grow in Christ-likeness through him who bore the wrath for sins like vengeful anger.

A just end (36-44). Abigail’s report to sobered-up Nabal about her actions proves too much for him. Verse 37: his heart died within him, and he became as a stone. Stroke? Heart attack? Not sure. But the writer leaves no doubt about the outcome in v. 38: And about ten days later the LORD struck Nabal, and he died. David’s words in v. 39 reveal a huge I-get-it:

When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, “Blessed be the LORD who has avenged the insult I received at the hand of Nabal, and has kept back his servant from wrongdoing. The LORD has returned the evil of Nabal on his own head.” Then David sent and spoke to Abigail, to take her as his wife.

Have you learned this Romans 12:19 lesson? Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is Mine; I will repay, says the Lord.” God is not mocked. Whatever we sow, we reap. David passed the anger test here thanks to Abigail’s extraordinary help. But the rest of the text hints that he failed to apply the principle of self-restraint and disciplined waiting in another area of testing: the temptation to lust.

He multiplied wives. He began the “taking” Samuel warned that kings would do (8:11-18). Abigail (42). Ahinoam (43). How can we not see a portent of the Bathsheba disgrace of 2 Samuel 11? And the spilt blood of her husband Uriah? Bloodguilt haunted David and its consequences plagued his descendants from that point on.

No wonder Jesus taught us to pray in Matthew 6:13: Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. And warned in Matthew 26:14: Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. Genesis 4:7 pertains to us all: Sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you, but you must rule over it. How? Rely on the strength of the One who waited on the Father with perfect self-restraint under Satan’s temptations in Matthew 4 and arm yourself with the precious promise of 1 Corinthians 10:13: No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

J. I. Packer advised: [God] leaves us in a world of sin to be tried, tested, belaboured by troubles that threaten to crush us—in order that we may glorify Him by our patience under suffering, and in order that He may display the riches of His grace and call forth new praises from us as He constantly upholds and delivers us.

And I venture to add, works in us virtues of self-restraint and patient waiting on Him.

A PERFECT BOOK FOR OUR POLARIZED AGE

August 10, 2020August 10, 2020 / revheff / 5 Comments

A Review of Christ-Centered Conflict Resolution

It was my joy and honor to write this review posted today at The Gospel Coalition website.

To read the article click here.

HOW TO RESOLVE CONFLICT AND PRESERVE UNITY IN YOUR CHURCH

November 6, 2018 / revheff / Leave a comment

Now Live: TGC Podcast About “The Peacemaking Church”

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“Surreal” was the word Jan used when I informed her this morning that my interview with Collin Hansen was now available for listening at the Gospel Coalition website.

True enough. It continues to strike me as surreal that only fourteen days remain before the release of The Peacemaking Church.

If you would like to learn more about the story behind and the tools contained in the book, you can listen to the thirty-six minute podcast here.

Many thanks for your interest and valuable time.

T4G

April 11, 2016 / revheff / 1 Comment

Why I’m Thrilled to Travel to Louisville this Week!

T4G stands for “Together for the Gospel.” Every other year some pretty heavy hitters in the world of reformed evangelicalism pool their efforts to host this amazing event.

I’ve managed to go twice over the years. God never fails to show up. With the 500th birthday of the Protestant Reformation right around the corner, no way did I want to miss this edition. Check out the quick video clip below to see what I mean:

https://vimeo.com/132860294

I feel so fortunate to have pastored a Reformed Baptist congregation for the past eleven years. That we get to stand on the shoulders of the likes of Luther, Calvin, and the rest to proclaim the doctrines of grace to our city, I take as an enormously serious stewardship.

Thankfully my jaw has healed enough to allow the trip. I’m asking the Lord to speak in profound ways to me and the thousands of other pastors who will attend this week. Would you pray to that end as well?

According to the T4G website, they plan to live stream the sessions in case you want to join the event at any point. Sweet!

On Asking Why

November 22, 2015 / revheff / Leave a comment

For some reason I don’t usually. Ask the Lord why He lets me suffer like I am right now with my jaw, that is. Well, there was that time in 2005. I had finished cancer treatment with all its nausea and vomiting. My expectation that those symptoms would cease soon after the last chemo blast proved to be wishful thinking. One particularly violent episode turned into a flood of tears and a very loud “Why, Lord?” in my family room.

But for the most part, I’m not inclined to go there. Perhaps one reason lies in what I know the Bible teaches about God’s purposes in the trials He ordains for us. There’s a world of instruction in various texts to that end. For example, that we might grow in steadfastness which would have its perfect result—complete, lacking in nothing (Jas. 1:2-4). Or that we would be able to comfort others with the same comfort whereby we have been comforted by Jesus (2 Cor. 1:3-5). And that we get to identify with the Master in His sufferings because the servant is certainly no greater than He is (1 Pet. 2:21). I could go on.

Another reason for trials in our lives dawned on me recently with comforting intensity. In the middle of HBO2 dive #10, one of the nurse/techs engaged me about what kind if church I pastor. The Lord opened a door for the gospel so big, even I could drive a summary presentation of the good news through it! For once I had the presence of mind to make the most of the opportunity. I laid the truth in love on the man. It almost made my sentencing to hyperbaric oxygen prison palatable. Almost.

And then I thought of Paul’s attitude in Phil. 1:12-13. Writing from prison, here is how he framed his difficult circumstances:

I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ.

Now I can’t say that it has become known throughout the whole of Florida Hospital that my treatment is for Christ, but to some extent it is becoming known in the deep wound unit that this is the case. Frankly, that took a good bit of the pain out of this preacher’s jaw that day. Have you considered the possibility that, among other reasons, one why for your trial involves God’s plan for your beautiful feet to bring the gospel of peace to someone in need?

Jaw Joy

September 23, 2015 / revheff / Leave a comment

I won’t make this a long post. But post I must.

Jaw pain on my right side has plagued me since a root canal tooth failed in May. This morning I underwent oral surgery to remove dead bone on the right side of my jaw. The procedure exceeded my expectations. My surgeon cleaned out a bunch of junk. He did a superior job. That I can work on a blog post the same day testifies to that effect.

I got to thinking about one’s jaw. I admit it. I take mine, both sides, for granted. I shouldn’t. My right side got hammered ten years ago with radiation treatment for head and neck cancer. Gotta love cancer treatment, conventional style. While cancer cells get killed, so also do healthy cells. Hey, I’m not complaining. I’m still preaching ten years later. My complications have been minimal. Couldn’t be more grateful.

Still, there is this jaw thing. Preacher’s tend to make connections from the experiential to the spiritual. Here’s mine, with the help of Puritan Matthew Henry, from Hosea 11:1-7.

He eased them of the burdens they had been long groaning under: I was to them as those that take off the yoke on their jaws, alluding to the care of the good husbandman, who is merciful to his beast, and will not tire him with hard and constant labour. Probably, in those times, the yoke on the neck of the oxen was fastened with some bridle, or headstall, over the jaws, which muzzled the mouth of the ox. Israel in Egypt were thus restrained from the enjoyments of their comforts and constrained to hard labour; but God eased them, removed their shoulder from the burden, Ps. 81:6. Note, Liberty is a great mercy, especially out of bondage (emphasis mine).

Do you see that phrase, I was to them as those that take off the yoke on their jaws? At this point in my spiritual journey, no other verse may matter more to me in the strengthening of my faith to finish strong. Do I long for the pain in my jaw to abate? Absolutely.

Would I trade that for the confidence that Jesus, by His gracious death on the cross and victorious resurrection from the dead, has TAKEN OFF THE JAW OF WORKS and given this unworthy ox the mercy of laboring under gospel grace?

Not in a million years.

Thank you, my great Savior, for using my frail jaw for reminding me once again of your great grace.

This jaw, what’s left of it, praises You.

A Dead Guy’s Take on Idol Smashing

February 24, 2015 / revheff / Leave a comment

In our Resolving Everyday Conflict class last Sunday, the video lesson made mention of a helpful resource for ridding ourselves of the idols that often lie at the root of our conflicts.

I promised I would post a link to the sermon manuscript by Thomas Chalmers entitled “The Expulsive Power of a New Affection.” A bit long and dense, perhaps requiring more than one reading, it is well worth the time and effort.

Here is how Amazon summarizes the treatise:

Dr. Chalmers states that “It is seldom that any of our tastes are made to disappear by a mere process of natural extinction,” and “the heart must have something to cling to—and never, by its own voluntary consent, will it so denude itself of all its attachments.” Therefore the superior affection for God through the free Gospel of Christ is necessary to displace worldly affections. This sermon, written by one of the foremost minds of his day, has become seminal for modern thought.

Check it out and happy idol smashing.

The ABCs of REC

January 7, 2015 / revheff / 2 Comments

So no doubt you get the idea behind the ABCs. The basics. The starting place. The fundamentals. To quote Coach Lombardi of Green Bay Packer’s fame on opening day of summer camp: “Gentleman, this is a football.”

What in the world is REC? Resolving Everyday Conflict.

Last Sunday we began a journey at OGC of working through this study by Peacemaker Ministries. It aims to help us navigate the troubled waters of inevitable conflict in relationships in a redemptive way. If you missed session one, you are more than welcome to join us this Sunday at 9:30 AM for part two.

In session one I did my peacemaking version of “this is a football.” I covered the ABCs of REC. Ready?

A – awareness of one’s heart. Two key texts anchored our study. James 4:1-3 gives us this building block of the ABCs.

What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.

To deal with the symptom you have to know the cause. James makes it plain. Passions, cravings, idols of the hearts, often good things that become god things and end up bad things more than not turn disagreements into relational war. So stand guard over your heart from the get go. Be suspicious of your own desires-turned-demands that throw gasoline on the disagreement fire.

B – burdened for others’ interests. Philippians 2:3-4 shape this fundamental.

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Paul assumes we will do the self-interest part of the equation. What he pleads is that we will give the same level of concern to what drives others in our conflicts. It’s not an either/or proposition; it’s a both/and one.

C – consumed with Jesus’ mindset. Paul tells the rest of the story in Philippians 2:5-11.

Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Imagine that. He points us to the gospel – Jesus sacrificially humbled on the cross, then gloriously exalted in the heavens. Jesus sets the pace for us. He puts the bar high by His own example. But that alone will never get us to a place of concerned deferral to others even sacrificially. Please note. A mind like this, one that looks out for interests of others to such a sacrificial degree, is yours in Christ Jesus. That’s what he wrote. It’s our very own possession. Because we are in Christ we have the supernatural strength to elude the grip of selfishness and travel the way of others-interests. That’s terribly good news.

These are the ABCs of REC. How’s your grade lately in the school of conflict resolution? Maybe you could use some remedial tutoring? Hope to see you Sunday.

Not One, But Two

December 18, 2013 / revheff / Leave a comment

Opportunities, that is.

For what? Bending the gospel outward at OGC this weekend.

The first comes this Friday, December 20, in the form of a free Christmas concert featuring a new group getting airtime on Z88.3 FM in Orlando called “All Things New.” Here’s a sample of what you will hear:

You can go on mission with this option in one of two ways. First, you can volunteer to serve on one of the teams. We need greeters, parking attendants, security, among other things. Contact the church office if you want to get in on the fun. Second, you can bring a friend and use the time together as a chance to connect about spiritual things. For more information about the concert click here.

The second opportunity takes place the very next morning at 9 AM at the All Women’s Health Center in Altamonte Springs. Various churches from around the city will convene at this abortion center for a twenty minute Christmas caroling and prayer service on the sidewalk. The mill will be open for “business” during this time. I have been asked to lead in prayer as part of the service. For those who can, the group will proceed from there to other abortion clinics in the Orlando area. For more information, contact the church office and ask for me. Ample parking is available at Pharmacy Specialists just north of the center on Maitland Avenue. This is a no brainer mission opportunity for us at OGC since our facility is right down the street from this house of horrors. You won’t have to do anything more than pray and carol and trust God to work in the hearts of some folks that may lead to the rescue of one or more infants in the womb.

Come on church. Let’s bless the city and storm the gates that won’t prevail against the church of King Jesus!

SHOW & Tell

October 30, 2013 / revheff / Leave a comment

Mega kudos to one of my alma maters. This fall, RTS Orlando sponsored something called “The Current Read.” They unpack their motivation this way:

We believe that the Christian community should be full of thoughtful readers. For this reason, we’ve created a book program called The Current Read that encourages not only our students, but others in the Orlando area, to read a book together, discussing the issues it raises and engaging the topic with the author at a “meet the author” event at the culmination of the program. Each fall, the library staff choose a thought-provoking book for the program and plan events to correspond with the reading.

When I received notice earlier this year, I jumped at the opportunity. I ordered the current offering and RSVPd for the author meet-and-greet. That event occurred this morning in downtown Orlando. I happened to engage Mr. Douthat while grabbing a bite in the breakfast line. I asked if I could share something personal with him. He obliged. I proceeded to tell him that I read his thought-provoking book during my recent vacation in Idaho. In so many words, I encouraged him with my testimony of just how much wind the read blew into my pastoral sails. His book, along with other means, convicted me more than ever to hunker down and plow on in my role as a pastor of a confessional church in suburban Orlando where much of what he describes does indeed ail the church. He admitted how humbled he felt at such a notion. His autograph signing of my personal copy of Bad Religion revealed as much. Nice. I might have to start reading the New York Times.

As I listened to his remarks during breakfast, one thing above all stood out. He spoke very strongly about the need for the church of Jesus Christ in this day and age to do more showing than telling in order to win a hearing about its message. The deficit brought about by the preponderance of heresies masquerading as the real deal has so disenfranchised the average American that now more than ever more than not we have to show folks the real thing before we get to tell them about the real thing.

My take away is this: bridge building into the culture is a big deal. Doing things like free-parking outreaches and craft fairs and whatever else we can come up with to connect with those outside the church is something we must make a priority as we continue to strive to bless our city and preach the gospel.

It’s time for show and tell with a heavy emphasis on show so we get to tell when God gives us opportunity. Covenant member at OGC – will you pray for the craft fair? Will you serve at the craft fair? Will you visit the craft fair or if not, will you plan to participate in the next available opportunity you have for bridge-building? Titus 3:1 says to be ready for every good work. Are we?